Showing posts with label Miscarriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Miscarriage. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The Pity Party Is Over!

Ok, I'm done! I gave myself a good 12 hours to bathe in self pity, but now I have to move on. I still have a baby counting on me. I can't let stress or emotions endanger this babies life as well. Of course, Mike and I are still sad about the loss of "Baby B" but at least we had him for a little while. While I was waiting to find out if IVF had worked for us, I never once cared if it was twins or not. Honestly, a few of you might remember that I was CONVINCED that it was only one baby and I told everyone I thought it was a girl. It wasn't until I had that ultrasound that showed twins that I even cared how many were in there. The fact of the matter is, the only thing I cared about when that second pink line showed up was that it meant I was pregnant. That fact still remains. I AM STILL PREGNANT. Sure, I will always miss Baby B and always think about the "what-if's" but I can't go through the rest of this pregnancy like that. I owe it to "Baby A" to remember every second of this pregnancy as the exhilarating miracle that it is. I owe it to Greysen, so that one day when I'm sitting on the side of her bed, I can tell her what a amazing blessing that she truly is. I don't want to look back at the time when I was carrying her and have any feelings of sadness. I want to look back and remember that I was pregnant with twins but GAVE BIRTH to a single baby, not that I was pregnant with twins and miscarried one.

I AM STILL PREGNANT!

We lost one of the twins :(

Well Mike and I went in for my 11w1d u/s today and got the bad news that Baby B died about a week ago. Its crazy to me because we had an ultrasound only a few days before it happened and he or she had a strong heartbeat and looked great. I know this sometimes happens with Twins but after 10 weeks, I just wasn't expecting it. I guess no one ever does though. Baby A (Who will from now on just be "THE BABY" ) Looked great, very healthy, and measuring right on track. It was so cool, we could see it kicking and wiggling its arms and moving all around. It's a fully formed baby now. They also told us that they think The Baby is a girl!!! She warned us that it's still early and plenty of room for error, but by the way the baby looked today from a couple of different angles, she definitely thought it was a GIRL!

I'm doing OK, I really don't think the news about baby B has sunk in yet. It's almost like I'm numb. I'm sure things will start to sink in over the next few days, however for now I'm just trying to focus on the amazing pictures of our one surviving baby!